Resistance is like a Jedi mind trick. Although it’s not there, it feels like it. It becomes more powerful the more you think about it.
New goals will likely fall apart before February ends. According to Strava, a social network for athletes, this is the case.
The company analysed more than 31.5million fitness records from its users. It found that annual commitments begin to fall in January. Strava’s research is based on its users, so it could be biased. However, a study by the Journal of Substance Abuse Treatment that produced similar results showed that only 55% of participants stayed true to their goals for a whole month.
Don’t let the data discourage.
Resistance is normal. It’s normal to feel resistance when trying to change. Do not fight resistance, but accept it as it will. Recognizing resistance and understanding why it occurs will allow you to focus your energy on making positive change last.
By taking the time to think about the obstacles, roadblocks and impediments that you might encounter during the change process, your resistance levels can be reduced and your chances of success will increase. These are the steps that will help you get through it.
Step 1: Keep in mind the reason you are pursuing your goal
Reconnect with the reason why you initiated the change, resolution, goal, or process. These are the four questions you need to answer:
* What happens if I make a change?
* What happens if I don’t make a change?
* What will happen if I make a change?
* What will happen if I don’t make changes?
Step 2: Identify the root cause of resistance
Don’t judge! You don’t have to judge!
Take a 10-minute rest, then return to the task.
Step three: Just do it
Do not act in opposition to your feelings. You can always make your sales calls even if you don’t feel like it.
Step four: Let go
Get involved. Let go of the things you don’t have control over. Sometimes, it is enough to be aware of your repetitive patterns. Sometimes, however, we need to dive deeper.
According to the book A Course of Miracles, there are only two emotions: fear and love. If you feel resistance to something, find the fear behind it and find a solution.
Final thoughts: How to identify what could kill your goals
My mentor and friend Tom Ferry wrote about four “addictions,” which kill more dreams than any other. They are all patterns that we can control and change, in my opinion.
The dependence on the opinions of others. We are addicted to the opinions of others and how their worldviews impact us as a society.
Drama addiction. People can be drawn to and consumed with any situation or event that occupies them and fills them with negativity. This often leads to unproductive attention.
The addiction to the past. These people are addicted to the past and have an unhealthy attachment.
The addiction to worry. This addiction includes all negative and self-destructive thoughts that make us anxious and upset.
Resistance is not futile. It’s a valuable tool for learning. Make use of it! Breakdown to breakthrough!
Mark Johnson, co-founder of CoRecruit, is a business partner at Third Pool Recruiting. He is also an author, speaker, and thought leader in real estate.